My Avon Lady

You know, thanks to the craziness of the time change, I completely forgot my 4 o'clock appointment with Prunella, my Avon lady. Just as I was walking out the door to go to Walgreens, there she was on my porch with a basket of goodies.

So I invited her in and she gave me a facial, and she did my makeup...

Prunella: Viola! What do you think Madge?
Me: My Gawd! I look like a 65 year old drag queen!
Prunella: Well I told you I'd make you look ten years younger.
Me: Yes, but did you have to make me look like Tim Burton on crack?!
Prunella: Now now, Madge. Here, I brought you some bath beads made with real milk.
Me: Great. Then when I'm soaking and I get hungry, I'll add some Raisin Bran .