HELLLLLLLLOOOOOOOO KIDS!!!

Long time no see, how ya been? Well, to give you an update, my birthday (June 5th) was wonderful. Can you believe that I am 77 fucking years old! Gal damn already, 3 years and I hit the big 8-0! Shit! (Hey, I know you don't like hearing old ladies swear, but dammit, I've survived two world wars, Reaganomics, two Bushes, several recessions, and I grew up in the Great Depression, so dammit, I can fucking swear all I want!)

Ok, birthday was fun, Agnes (who is doing well, still idiotically naive, but fine.) and Betty (she's a republican, she's got money, so you know she's fine) took me out to lunch at Kansas City's finest restaurant and then we went to the Video Saloon to knock a few sherries back. Thank God for cabs otherwise we'd a never made it home in time to pee. Old ladies bladders only last so long!

In other news, I got Maxine a shiny new collar, I sold my car to buy a new used one, and Dana (my evil daughter in law) is due sometime in late July, early August and I can't wait to be there for the birth. I hope that kid has a huge head, it'll serve Dana right for being such a witch to me the last few years (she comes from snooty parents, oy!)

Let's see, oh, I have totally restocked my book shelf with new flashy romance novels loaded with all that steamy sex I like to read about. Well, I don't have a man, and after going through all that crap with the late Murray, I've decided to stick with my novels and let those fictitious Southern Belles have all the fun.

Now, if you excuse me I have some serious knitting to do this evening while I watch old comedies on MeTV.

Love you kids!

~Madge